Living in Morpeth

Morpeth: Is it really as posh as the posters make it look? No!

Morpeth: the town centre is full of stuck up posh twats. By night it's full of drunks that walk the high street just looking for a fight.

Living in Ashington, Northumberland

Ashington is now a necrotic ulcer on the nether regions of the North East

There is no room for idiosyncrasy in Ashington – a crime punishable by the mob. No gays, no goths, no new-romantics.

Wooler

Wooler

In the morning this is a lovely rural town, old people go out and do their thing. Between midday and the afternoon they start to disappear, one by one. And I understand why... by the late

The sad decline of The North

The sad decline of The North

This country is a shell of its former self, and the blame lies not with those chavs , but the pin-striped gangsters at the top.

Living in Newbiggin by the Sea, Northumberland

Newbiggin-By-The-Sea full of mullet, snapback, tracky bottom wearing idiots

Newbiggin-By-The-Sea is by far, one of the shittiest places to be in the whole of Northumberland.