Preston and the towns surrounding it must be the chaviest place in the country. Wherever you look you are sure to see a gang of scallies drinking cheap cider or playing with their stolen mobile phones. Their favourite places to stand around are the bus station, mcdonalds, outside home bargins, and on the market. You are most likely to see them terrorising pidgens or shouting abusive comments at elderly or disabled people. If you are a goth or a mosher, dont be suprized when your head gets set on fire. ***** seem to have a problem with people who dont shop at JJB sports.
Bamber Bridge and Clayton Brook aka Scally-land (both near preston) are other towns popular with *****. When walking home in Clayton Brook at night it is likely that a firework will be thrown at you so make sure you wear protective flameproof clothing at all times. In Bamber Bridge, the ***** like to hang out near spar or outside “Bargin Booze”. They usually go in to these shops several times a night trying to buy alcohol but they can never get served because they are all fourteen years old. They think being pregnant makes them look older! When a townie asks you for a light, please do not be fooled. The **** does not want a lighter to light its cigarette. It wants a lighter so it can set your hair on fire then steal your wallet to buy cigarettes.
That is all there is to know about Preston. If you have difficulty finding it, just follow the trail of mugged old ladies and discarded shopping trollies.
