My friend Marc had this to say about his home town.. “Leicester (also known as ‘Lesta’) is one of the fastest growing **** cities in the UK. An average of 10 children per hour switch from baggy trousers and Linkin Park hoodies to Adidas track suits and Nike sweatshirts because it’s ‘well safe man innit’. […]
Category: East Midlands
The worst places to live in the East Midlands
Nottingham
I am pretty sure, despite all other allegations, that Nottingham is the **** epi-centre of the United Kingdom. You can’t walk down any street without hearing the familiar ‘Narr, innit’ sounds (The good thing about ***** is that you can generally hear them before you see them!). It’s getting to a point where ‘hate’ would […]
Bolsover: at night it becomes a typical dirt hole
Bolsover is a small former mining town in Derbyshire. At first you think that it is a pleasant town. Unfortunately, when you see it at night it becomes a typical **** sh*thole. At night the ***** enjoy ******* around the market square. The ***** are of the usual quality of fake Burberry caps and knocked-off […]
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Loughborough
Loughborough – A **** Utopia **** Estates PLC Are you looking for somewhere to bring up your **** children? Loughborough may be the place for you. We have a wide variety of council estates where you will be able to sponge off the state and enjoy living in the squalor you have become accustomed to. […]
Leicester
Town centre of Leicester, hang outs include maccy ds, iceland, pound shops and Argos. Leicester is home to the ********* ***** around, as well as hundreds of druggie ***** that shop lift every day. The clock tower in the town centre is a haven for them and the latest accessory for any up and coming […]
Daventry
Daventry, Northamptonshire – Full of 10-toes-to-a-foot, forehead shaving, sportswear clad, hillbilly gimps. A ghastly little town which has the misfortune to house some of the most **** social misfits ever to walk the planet. The locals are thick and ****** – where you aren’t accepted in polite society unless mum, dad and sister comes to […]
Beaumont Leys, Leicester
Leicester has many **** suburbs but two in particular stand out. One of these is Beaumont Leys. The place was one of those idealistic suburbs of the 1970s/earlly 1980s with the idea of creating a nice leafy suburb with drab council property’s (clever or what!). This turned out to be a **** idea as by […]
Belper, known as “Brown Town” for its off-the-scale drug problem
Belper is a handful of miles above derby, but just as notorious for its *****. Known as “Brown Town” for its off-the-scale drug problem, the local name for ***** here is Townies. They plague the town centre in droves, adorning their sports clothes with their ridiculously big football socks tucking over their adidas trousers. Baseball […]
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Sleaford
Not the archetypal ****-ville, here in deepest darkest Lincolnshire but well on the way. **** HQ is now the Drove end of town where they vie for power with the spliff and smack heads. Sleaford ***** favour bikes far too small for themselves and sport off-white baseball caps (only the tribal leaders can pretend to […]
Derby
The Derby **** has two outfits, his daytime gear consists of a kappa tracksuit, with carbrini hoody or one of those tops covered in white scribbles. He also wears the notorious burberry cap either peaked upwards or positioned to either to the left or right. At night he wears faded jeans and a ben sherman […]
Loughborough
Loughborough for me has to be one of the ********* towns around! This town in North Leicestershire is also a University town but dont let that fool you. Whenever I have the misfortune of visiting this dump it seems that the academic crowd (all the lecturers live in quiet villages in the Charnwood Forest) are […]
Boston
Boston **** City I hereby put forward my nomination for the **** capital of the UK as Boston, Lincolnshire. After travelling around much of the country, I have noticed that most towns have a good share of baseball cap wearing, Eminem criminal wanabees and hoop earinged, gum chewing little *****. But only one place to […]
