Yes, I know Salford has been done twice already, but it really is unspeakabally **** that nobody could ever hope to do it justice. But what the hell, I thought I’d give it a go anyway. Salford’s biggest claim to fame, of course, is being the birthplace of the highly overrated artist L. S. Lowry, […]
Category: North West
The worst places to live in North West England
Preston – Birthplace of the ****?
In Preston, angles are important. Sadly, I’m not referring to trigonometric analyses, I’m talking about a number of ***** practises. Your cap must stand, without fail, at no less than 90 degrees upwards from your line of vision. Also, when walking down the streets of Preston, you must sway from side to side by no […]
Birkenhead….liverpool’s throwback
Just over that river styx…sorry mersey from the **** capital of culture 2008, lies a town that I cannot believe had had a mention here so far….Birkenhead is a town that personifies *****, at least if you go out in any other town there are at least some “normal” people walkin around, go to birkenhead, […]
Sunderland – Home of the ****
Sunderland – the **** capital of the world! Don’t worry if you’ve never heard of this fair city, the only reason it ever makes the news is that it’s the only city where the BNP made significant gains and the football holigans are legendary. Frankly you’re not missing much. Sunderland’s only other claim to fame […]
Stockport
Believe me.. this is the HOME of the Scallies. They have given so much to the contribution of the scallie. First… Let me begin with clothing. Undoubtedly, Burberry always wins. However, Fred Perry clothing. Man, this was a biggie. Blue jumpers, white strip and Fred Perry logo. Now, is this a coincidence? Yes. Most of […]
Keighkey
well keighley…i believe it is the home of the *****, or townies as they are called up north. i love this town and believe that our townies are the best around. most of us have been brought up in the council estates of braithwaite or the rivals Brackenbankers! pretty good life of just messin around. […]
Shipley, West Yorkshire.
Shipley, home of the criminally ******** ‘juvenile delinquent’ ****. Shipley is a small town just to the north of the utter **** hole that is Bradford. It is almost entirely populated by *****. The town centre is a cultural black hole, filled with savage faced teen-**** mums pushing their semi-******** ****** kids around in search […]
Runcorn; a big ****** blister just outside Liverpool
Runcorn, slum of the northwest, home to the most despicable form of **** (around here they are fondly known as scallies). Basically, Runcorn is full of the type of people who shouldn’t have been allowed to enter the gene pool, but as if that isn’t bad enough, they have interbred to produce pure ****. The […]
Read More… from Runcorn; a big ****** blister just outside Liverpool
Middleton
They tried so hard with Middleton. Back in the day, they built one of the first ‘Arndale’ centres – people flocked for miles around to sample this new, modern, concrete environment. They put flowers and benches in the precinct, built a community centre, investments were made and the future was bright. But there was one […]
Hyde-Scally/**** central Having read some of the articles on various towns around the country I felt I had to add my own for the ********* town in the United Kingdom. I spent most of my life growing up elsewhere and everything was perfect until I moved to Hyde last year, please the mental trauma is […]
Crewe (Cheshire)
Crewe – A sceptic spot six inches up the ******** of England According to the tourist board, Crewe is a beautiful historic town set in the southern lowlands of Cheshire, with a rich heritage in the rail industry, an association that continues until today. That’s the bullshit. If you want the reality, visit the place. […]
Gateshead
I’d like to tell you about a funny thing that happened to me a few weeks ago. You might not believe it but it’s true. It all began on rainy Saturday morning when I went to the shop for some coca-cola for my lovely angela who was blissfully snoring on my sofa having watched Saturday […]
