Knott End & Preesall: where the spirits die of boredom. Believe it or not there are places upon this earth that could only come from the warped imagination of some evil genius James Bond villain type. A dark figure sat in a lounge chair, cackling with glee whilst stroking a cat, conjuring up their latest […]
Newcastle Upon Tyne, a quaint city boasting lots of architectural features from which you can hurl yourself off when life in this grey hued eugenics tribute act gets to much [although we at iLiveHere would never advocate this or to use the native language “y’divit wanna dee that pet” and yes, that’s our legal backside […]
So you wish to give up on life and can’t afford the one way trip to Switzerland? You wish to go for the slow option, terminal decline along the Helter-Skelter to absolute oblivion? But how do you carry out the ‘slow’ option, a lingering, gradual death? Well there is one place that captures death in […]
Read More… from Blackpool: Through the Brown Eye of the 5th horseman and out to Dante’s cesspit
If you are thinking of moving here to live by the sea in Devon while working in a job under £30’000 a year?? Then don’t! What you’ll get is either a victorian slum that’s overpriced, or a nice apartment in a block full of holiday homes. And believe me, Karen’s will constantly belittle you for […]
Ahh good old Crawley… where to start? Let me start with the sh*thole county mall: the type of mall that not only favours fake mobile phone shops and cheap crappy clothing. It also favours ***** that desire ruining your shopping day by calling you a **** or a f*ggot. This mall is so bad for […]
Read More… from Crappy Crawley – depressing hole of the south
Bulwell,on the whole is no worse than any other market town on the edge of a large city. All the local pubs that are left stink of toilets, sweaty feet and cheap paint. So do most of the die hard punters who live in them. Bulwell is not the place for a quiet relaxing pint […]
Hailed as a cultural mecca by the [allegedly] corrupt city Council, the toon (Newcastle) is not somewhere a sentient being would go to make a pilgrimage. The culture largely consists of some big buildings covered in pigeon ****. Yes, there are universities, but the only locals they contain are cleaning the toilets. Meet the Locals […]
It’s about time we stopped knocking the working class and poor *****. The biggest problem I believe Ilfracombe has, is its whole generation of 16-24 year olds raised by middle class parents. They fill Ilfracombe’s restaurants and cafés, announcing every self diagnosed intolerance. Gluten intolerance or lactose, if it’s trendy to have… They have it. […]
Read More… from Ilfracombe: gluten intolerant middle class nightmare
If you manage to get through North Shields alive, or bear the brunt of the perpetual traffic jam of the A1058 ‘coast road’, you might make it to Tynemouth, but it’s probably not worth risking either route unless you; Surf badly Are over the age of 50 Like rubbish castles Tynemouth is full of rubbish […]
Read More… from Tynemouth – Pearly White False Teeth Mouth of the Tyne
I have sadly lived in the Whitchurch and Wem area all of my life (31 years) and have to say, it is one of the most awful places in the entire universe! Frequented by a mix of country yocals who look like they take a bath once a year, ***** (originally from overspill towns in […]
I grew up in “Chip-nerm”, before it exploded into its current sprawl of field-obliterating estates. It was actually quite a pleasant town, which ended at the Pheasant Pub to the west and at the cemetery/ Hardens Mead to the east. This was when Westinghouse was still going strong (I worked in the foundry), Westmead Junior […]
Read More… from Chippenham – a burgeoning dystopia of morons
After dating for 3 years it was time my partner and I bought a house together. She growing up in rural paradise of Horton Kirby and myself growing up in Abbey Wood we plumped for somewhere in the middle – Dartford! At first inspection I thought “at least Dartford can’t get any worse!” How wrong […]
