Ahhh Aberystwyth, a lovely seaside student town full of surfers, indie chicks and dudes and generally decent people with an above average IQ. surrounded by beaches and with a backdrop of mountains it is a scenic and perfect escape…..with one downfall its the end of the railway line from Birmingham and *****/********* discovered this hideaway after falling asleep off their heads on “white shitte” an ending up here and making it their summer getaway.
Within a few weeks they are literally everywhere crowding the streets and the beaches. walking round the town slack jawed with the obligatory bad bright red tan lines. These little ******** will not only visit for weeks at a time, trashing the seafront, pulling up all the flowers and stealing from local shops, but will actually attempt to stay in Aberystwyth forever applying for a council house or a trailer cause “they wanna give little Jordan and Chardonnay a better future!”
They then go about breeding with the Aberystwyth wannabe *****, creating this hybrid clan of absolute morons who look like a cross between Shrek and swamp thing, to fulfil their **** destiny of ******* around 24hr spar abusing students but making sure they are in safe distance of a security guard, so if someone does decide to give them a good pummeling, the police will be called and they may not be to badly hurt.
After visiting places like Salford and Oldham which seems home to a particularly nasty breed of **** (having a knife pulled on me on a bus because “looked like a mosher” init!) the Aberystywth ***** however intimidating they try to be come of as, pathetic losers in **** cars who go out with 13 year old girls cause no woman their age with half a brain cell would date them.
The population seems to grow every year and we are fearing an absolute take over what do we do?
