Visit Bradford, The pound shop mecca of the north.
You call em ****’s we call em scroats… different name, same ****.
They swan around in their ‘George at Asda‘ imitation burbury caps, and
Adidas tracksuit tops from Matalan, 2 for a fiver.
They all hang around outside Index in’t Arndale Centre while
the ******** gets her 3″ diameter hooped earings from Lucy Lockets and
lad gets his PAYG £5 topup in’t Car Phone Warehouse.
They’ll be Grandmother ****, Tina (32 yrs) queuing up at the postie on Ivegate,
with a *** in hand and a giro / disability benifit burning a hole in her bum
bag, with her baby grandaughter ******** ,Kay-liegh, in her arms, because mother
**** Kylie (14 yrs) is on the estate doing her community rehabilitation order.
15 year old ChavDad Kyle will be hard at work in Cash Converters on Westgate
bartering for best price on his 5 DVD players, 2 XBOX’s and a playstation 2
from last night’s burglarys **allegedly** (Cash Converters are a fine law abiding company that does not buy stolen goods. However many people could argue that they profit off the very poorest members of society who frequently need to pawn their few meagre possessions to survive. Such activity is not illegal, just totally morally reprehensible in my view. They may also do a lot of great work for Charity. However I’m sure Cash Converters will argue that this form of ‘corporate social responsibility’ is not a cheap publicity exercise to divert peoples attention away from what some people could describe as their unsavoury core business operation. – Chavtowns Webmaster).
Nobody can say bradford isn’t diverse, here in bradford, we even have wannabe
asian ****’s who have to take things one step further with compulsary golden
tooth, flashing keypad nokia phones ( x 2, one for mum, and other for deals),
and ‘F’ reg Honda Civic, “twin cam turbo mate init” with go slower UV
tubes underneath.
Of course they wont be ******* around outside Arndale Centre, prefering to sit
4 a breast in their Civics comparing sovereign rings and psudo jamaican gangser
accents.
One of the scariest things about bradford is that you cannot tell when the
****’s have moved into town, as they blend seemlessly into the ********* pushing
their car boot prams about town between New Look and the bus station, except
for the obvious lack of common Bradford accent.
So why delay visit bradford today!
