Yeovil, Somerset

I’m very surprised Yeovil has not been added until now! I can only presume that it’s because Yeovil is 96% **** that no one knows of this site. If they have IT skills they are used for bidding on Price-Drop TV websites for tasteful 9ct ‘gold’ chains sold by *the weight* . This is prime ****-spoting territory. Never mind if there are high child motor accident rates, it’s more important to show your mate your new phone rather than watch over little Courtney/Britney/Josh and make sure she/he doesn’t run into the path of a souped-up escort cabriolet in peacock-blue. Argos/Wilkinson/Cash Generator do excellent business here as do kebabs-r-us. I believe Yeovil to have the highest consumption of Velour Hipster Tracksuits (size 12 but stretched to fit size 16) in the UK. Surprisingly, not all of the ***** hail from the council estates (most houses are bought on estates anyway) but many trek in from villages far and wide, many are farmer’s kids, having rejected the **** rural life in favour of rap’n’bling. My husband and I saw a sight the other day- a **** mum (one of the older ones, at least 17) full ‘croydon face-lift’, hoop earrings, pink tracksuit….and a WEDDING RING! Blimey! this is unusual however. Avoid Wetherspoon’s pub at all costs. Not only will you have to drink surrounded by *****, but possibly by their vomit too. Nice. The best thing about Yeovil is the A303 out of there ….but on 2nd thoughts, that only takes you to London, capital of all that is ****. You can’t escape. The funniest ***** are the nouveau riche Essex ***** who have sold up and moved to the countryside for ‘a bit of f****in’ peace an quiet’ and then complain because they can’t get a mobile phone signal/are no streetlamps/ cannot understand why their neighbours do not like karaoke for ‘Shells burfday do at 2am/their dog ‘Rocky’ gets shot for eating sheep.

Come to Yeovil…home of the Wessex ****…you won’t be disappointed!