Carrickfergus, an over spill of webslingers

Its been a few years since I left Carrick but I still travel back to see family and friends and **** has that place went down hill ! Commercially it is a ghost town where upon entering you should put on The Specials record of the same name.  The town center is a **** hole where all there is are cheap clothes shops and make up shops where *********  can buy some agent orange make up and cake it over their ******* ugly faces to make them into tango women.   14-18yr old ********* push hordes of kids in buggys that they have paid for with their child benifit ( me and your taxes ), sovereign rings sparkling with giant hoop ear rings which have been bought from Argos finest jewllers Elizabeth Duke, this along with a council face lift pony tail it just dont get any better in life……  Please dont forget the essential track suit bottoms with fat **** and gut ******* out the front with a hoody top and a feg ******* out of their mouths.  There these loyal ********* will make their way to such distinguished places as Wetherspoons were you can get sloshed for a tenner.  Up the street trying to double their dole money is  Carricks finest ***** in the bookies, pen behind the ear, white trainers, trackie bottoms and a skin tight T-Shirt when its ******* snowing or raining outside, what *****!!

Down in the car park you have your slightly more up market **** driving a 10year old Nova, Clio or some other **** heap that they have some how managed to obtain a loan for.  With go faster stripes, a ******* giant exhaust on it making it sound like a ******* Formula 1 car and suspension lowered to a inch of the ground these really are stupid little ***** zooming round the car park like ******* Lewis Hamilton.  The normal citizens of this once proud town have to put up with this ****.

Carrick basically is now an over spill of web slingers ( ****, spides ) from Belfast and Newtownabbey and is getting worse.  Try and walk home from a pub on a Saturday night taking a short cut through Shaftsberry Gardens and its like going on a ******* unknown mission in Afganistan as there are web slingers in every bush with their ********* drinking cider and vodka and waiting for some un suspecting punter to toodle past half pissed before he is jumped on.  As usual these little ***** are like Hyenas and only attack in groups NEVER one on one unless its against a OAP or a 8 yr old.

I could go on and give you more stories of this old town but it too depressing, still I suppose it still home !!!