25 towns to avoid where Reform rocked the polls

Do you hold progressive political views? Don’t want to find yourself in a town where a lot of the residents get upset by pronouns? A constituency where they still shout ‘We want our country back!’, despite getting their precious Brexit and really mean they want their 1960’s white monoculture fantasy? A place where they are in false class solidarity with people like Nigel Farage and Richard Tice, rather than people arriving on small boats?

Well we have you covered. Avoid these towns and you’ll never have to say ‘Don’t make me go back to my liberal hometown with tales of bigotry from the heart of Essex’ Jay and Silent Bob style, to a red-faced blustering aging cockney when you ask for oat milk in a café. Here are 25 towns where Reform got more than 25% of the vote in the 2024 General Election. Be afraid, be very afraid.

1. Rayleigh, Essex

   Rayleigh and Wickford constituency – 25.3% vote share

2. Swansea, Wales

   Neath and Swansea East constituency – 25.3% vote share

3. Grays, Essex

   Thurrock Constituency – 25.5% vote share

4. Chester-le-street, County Durham

   North Durham constituency – 25.7% vote share

5. Horncastle, Lincolnshire

   Louth and Horncastle Constituency – 25.7% vote share

6. Tonyrefail, Wales

   Rhondda and Ogmore constituency – 26.1% vote share

7. Atherton, Greater Manchester

   Leigh and Atherton constituency – 26.9% vote share

8. Jarrow, Tyne and Wear

   Jarrow and Gateshead East constituency – 26.9% vote share

9. Sunderland, Tyne and Wear

   Sunderland Central constituency – 27.0% vote share

10. Llanelli, Wales

    Llanelli Constituency – 27.6% vote share

11. Hornchurch, Greater London

    Hornchurch and Upminster constituency – 28.4% vote share

12. Rawmarsh, South Yorkshire

    Rawmarsh and Conisbrough constituency – 28.6% vote share

13. Cleethorpes, Lincolnshire

    Great Grimsby and Cleethorpes constituency – 28.8% vote share

14. Washington, Tyne and Wear

    Washington and Gateshead South Constituency – 29.1% vote share

15. Houghton-le-Spring, Tyne and Wear

    Houghton and Sunderland South constituency – 29.1% vote share

16. Pontefract, West Yorkshire

    Pontefract, Castleford and Knottingley Constituency – 29.1% vote share

17. Normanton, West Yorkshire

    Normanton and Hemsworth Constituency – 29.2% vote share

18. Rotherham, South Yorkshire

    Rotherham Constituency – 30.3% vote share

19. Hull, East Riding of Yorkshire

    Hull East Constituency – 30.6% vote share

20. Stanford-le-Hope, Essex

    South Basildon and East Thurrock Constituency – James McMurdock – Won with 30.8% vote share

21. Hindley, Greater Manchester

    Makerfield Constituency – 31.8% vote share

22. Great Yarmouth, Norfolk

    Great Yarmouth Constituency – Rupert Lowe – Won with 35.3% vote share

23. Skegness, Lincolnshire

    Boston and Skegness Constituency
    Won by Reform UK’s money man Richard Tice and co-director (along with Farage) of ‘Reform UK Party Limited’. A ‘for profit’ company the hard of thinking are pouring their pensions into, without any democratic say in how the party is run or how their subs are spent. Slow Clap. 38.4% of this Lincolnshire pit voted for this businessman who has now got to list his financial interests with parliament, which should make interesting reading. He’s a bit touchy about people describing Reform as ‘far-right’. They are (in our opinion alone, for legal reasons). Look at this National Front (NF) poster from 1974. Almost all the bullet points are now current Reform ‘contract’ items. Were the NF centre-right D*ck?
    

24. Sutton-in-Ashfield, Nottinghamshire

    Ashfield Constituency
    Won by former Labour Councillor, Deputy Conservative Party chairman and alleged paid defector and populist ‘rat leaving a sinking ship’, Lee Anderson with 42.8% of the vote. Yes, this town overwhelmingly voted for 30p Lee, the man who ‘says it like it is’ if you are Islamophobic, xenophobic, born before 1964 and are showing the first signs of dementia or were dropped on your head as a kid. He also has a healthy following from the kind of naive young men who paid for Andrew Tate’s cult-like content. Jesus wept. We wager that he’ll spend more than 30p a meal on his parliamentary expenses!

25. Clacton on sea, Essex

    Clacton Constituency
    Won by the special porkflake godhead and former commodities-trading multi-millionaire ‘man of the people’ (lol) Nigel Farage. 46.2% of this god forsaken hole voted for (in our opinion alone) the 21st century Oswald Mosley in a Golf club blazer. Sick of Youtubers on poverty safari in Jaywick, we think that the residents voted for Nige, because they thought it would put the town on the map for a different reason. It has. However, not in the way they expected. It will be in the same way Milwaukee is known for being the home of Jeffrey Dahmer. Well done Clactonians.

Sources: BBC Election 2024 and GBNews (yeah we had a sneaky peak over your pork wall!)