Living in Eastbourne

Eastbourne: God is ignoring this waiting room…

Eastbourne, Eastbourne...where to start? Stinky, skanky, utterly without charm. No good shops and a disproportionately high numbers of OAPs.

Living in Skelmersdale

Enter Skelmersdale Alive… Leave With A Posthumous Medal Of Bravery

Welcome to Skelmersdale. A town that will re-arrange your internal organs with its never-ending roundabouts.

Living in Peterborough

Peterborough: we felt as welcome as a turd in a swimming pool

Peterborough has without doubt, some of the most aggressive, miserable, backwards, negative people I have ever come across.

Living in Cinderford

Cinderford: There is a tenth circle of hell

Cinderford is a decrepit town in the arse end of Gloucestershire, with a population resembling Sauron’s army of orcs from Lord of the Rings.

Living in Coventry, West Midlands

Coventry = Liberal Dump

Steer clear of Coventry. DO NOT ENTER under ANY circumstances. Actually, just avoid the entire of the West Midlands, the whole place is crap