Living in Shaw, Greater Manchester

Shaw: The Place That Joy Forgot

All in all, Shaw is a sh*thole, and thank god I'm leaving for good. If you like being a tw@t, it could be the place for you

Living in Middleton

Middleton: some say Rochdale, some say Oldham, no matter it’s still a hole

No matter where you go in Middleton, be it Langley or Boarshaw, you'll still be able to smell the pungent aroma of somebody's weed grow-op.

Living in Shaw, Greater Manchester

Shaw, trapped between Oldham & Rochdale like a fart between bum cheeks

Shaw is unfriendly, poor, plagued by drugs, single mothers and work-shy white trash in knock off Paul & Shark sweaters and tracksuit bottoms

Living in Rochdale, Lancashire

Rochdale, gain an understanding of this excremental town

Rochdale, once described by Monty Python as a quaint Northern village, I'm sure you already recognise this as a great misnomer.

Living in Heywood

Heywood: it has nothing to offer anyone who is normal and decent

I worked in a shop in Heywood, some shoplifters would leave behind their methodone prescriptions along with their names and addresses.