Rishton: The Absolute low of Great Britain

Living in Rishton, Lancashire

First of all, Rishton is probably the worst place to live in Great Britain. If you can survive here then you are undoubtedly better than Bear Grylls. Most 12-16 year olds smoke and get into so much trouble that no amount of abuse from their parents can change it.You can hear police cars coming from […]

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Oh Longtown… You suck!

Living in Longtown, Cumbria

Longtown has a long history, especially with it being on the border of England and Scotland. Although ask many of the locals who were educated from the 80s onwards and they couldn’t tell you any of it. A lot of the shops are owned by natives of the town, which is good as they know […]

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Garstang – Had enough of the modern age?

Living in Garstang, Lancashire

Had enough of the modern age? Would you like to return to English traditions? If you also want to leave the delights of the nearby seaside for the glorious country, look no further! Garstang boasts views of the Trough of Bowland and there are plenty of choices if you like to drink in the pub […]

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Carlisle: the people who inhabit this city are not quite right

Living in Carlisle, Cumbria

Well Carlisle… A few days ago I was in the lovely town of Keswick, the picturesque mountains, the sunset glistening on the lake. As the love of my life enjoyed a fruit cider, as semi retired couples smiled and waved at my son and I, me being somewhat naive, jumped at the chance to work […]

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Darwen: a pretty little market town? the reality can’t be more different!

Living in Darwen, Lancashire

Darwen likes to promotes itself as a traditional pretty little market town, the reality however, can’t be any more different. People complain about Blackburn being full of *****, but at least there are brightly lit shops there to take your mind off the sheer scale of deprivation, teenage mothers, benefit claimants and alcoholics falling over […]

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Shaw: The Place That Joy Forgot

Living in Shaw, Greater Manchester

I spent a great deal of my formative years walking feverishly around the narrow field-bordered streets of Shaw, and found it difficult to describe to friends who would visit just why the place was so awful. To the untrained eye the hamlet seems quaint and even welcoming – this is a false perception. When I […]

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Buckshaw village – it’s becoming a **** place to be

Living in Buckshaw Village, Chorley

Buckshaw village in Chorley is one of those new villages what are cropping up around this now despicable country. It used to be an RAF base. It’s becoming a **** place to be. There seems to be a whole new sub culture of **** emerging. Most houses and flats are over 100 grand, but this […]

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Bedale is the red and grey brick cyst on the face of the otherwise picturesque Yorkshire dales

Living in Bedale, North Yorkshire

I must regretfully inform you reader that I have recently returned back to my home town of Bedale, which has recently been placed highly on a poll which lists several of the best market towns in the UK, somehow placed ahead of Mashamand Leyburn. And due to my connections with the town, and evidently by […]

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Nantwich: home of the yummy mummy & a sea of middle class insolence

Living in Nantwich, Cheshire

What can I say about Nantwich? Surrounded by pretty countryside, historic buildings abundant, friendly locals. That is until you meet the Yummy Mummy brigade. Sporting a brace of children a piece, these creatures take over the whole town until it becomes a sea of middle class insolence that only those with an iron will can […]

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Southport – God’s waiting room

Living in Southport, Merseyside

I’ve lived here in Southport all my life and to be honest it was better back in the 1970’s than it is now, and I’m only 46. It was great during the 80’s. Loads to do, lots of places to visit but in the last 15 or so years it’s gone downhill faster than Franz […]

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Nantwich – The Great Crewe/Nantwich Divide

Living in Nantwich

The subject of Nantwich’s integrity has been called up many times over the last decade. This is a place where the Lords and Ladies of Aston, the Barony of Acton and the Magisters of Wybunbury have long considered to be the most ‘urban’ destination that they are willing to drag little Jonty and Elisabet(no H) […]

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Bolton is a dump

Living in Bolton

Bolton itself is a dump. The best businesses are leaving or have left. Pound shops and cheap takeaways are everywhere. Some of the takeaways have reached the lofty heights of ONE star for hygiene. The usual benefits ********** are to be found pushing expensive prams while speaking their own language, which could be one of […]

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